This week, Harlequins’ skipper Paul Volley answers our life-changing questions…
Q. King Rollo or Bagpuss?
A. Got to be Bagpuss, every time.
Q. If not a rugby player…
A. Um, a gigolo, it’s something that I always wanted to be at university
Q. Do you believe in dinosaurs?
A. Yes.
Q. Most memorable team-talk?
A. The one before the Heineken Cup match against Munster – near enough everyone was crying before we went out.
Q. Who thinks he’s the best player at the club?
A. It’s got to be Gomars! I wish him all the best at the World Cup, but it’s got to be him.
Q. If you were a fruit what would you be and why?
A. I would go for a courgette because it’s long and green.
Q. What’s the best wind-up you’ve seen?
A. The best was when I was at Wasps and one of our boys phoned up another player pretending to be part of Clive Woodward’s England entourage asking for his free O2 telephone back because he’d been ditched by England – the player really bit too! Best of all, he [the wind-up merchant] taped the conversation and played it to everyone.
Q. How many profiteroles could you eat in one sitting?
A. I’d hazard a guess – say 15.
Q. And how many donuts?
A. Seven.
Q. Which team-mate would you least like to fight?
A. Danny Care because he’d be biting my ankles – he’s a little rottweiler
Q. Which super-hero would you like to be and why?
A. Have to be Spiderman because my son adores him.
Q. Who’s the worst-dressed player at the club?
A. Can we move away? (he’s sitting next to Dean Richards!) No, it would have to be Ugo Monye because, if he reads this, he’d absolutely kill me!
Q. Skintight shirts – yes or no?
A. Yes.
Q. Do the girls like a rugby player?
A. I hope so, although it is a bit late for me.
Q. If you could swap lives with any rugby player for a day who would it be and why?
A. It would be Jonny Wilkinson – to have a taste of all the women and all the money!
Q. What’s the best tour tale you’ve heard?
A. A long time ago, one of the boys admitting to his bird some of the terrible things he’d been doing – and telling her while stood in front of the boys! It’s probably not suitable to go into the details of what he’d
been up to!
Got a pointless – or even funny, we do them too – question that you’d like to ask a rugby player? If so email to them at nowlistenhere@rucked.com